Pitch: Feedback

In response to our feedback given, we have slightly altered our narrative and have decided to not reveal as much information as we initially thought. In response to Pheobe's question, yes we are including a dog in our opening, to make the scene seem more realistic, as if the girl was just walking around at dusk on her own it could come across as unrealistic.

Secondly, in response to Miss Orgar's question regarding whether we will have actors suitable for our filming, yes we are both trying to finds actors of a suitable age for our filming that will make the scene seem realistic. If we was to act at the age of 16, it would look odd, as we could not be police officers at our age and it is highly unlikely someone of our age would be questionned for murder.

Finally, responding to Miss Orgar's other question, we are going to firstly show the woman being questionned by the police, we are then going to flashback to the moment that Kirstie finds her sister dead whilst our on a walk with her dog. Moreover, we will then hear someone whispering to her, "this is your fault," "you killed her," and repeatedly saying her name. We then flashback to the same police questionning room as before, and hear the police officer trying to wake the women by repeatedly calling her name.

Through our research, we have decided to not reveal as much information, as it is only an opening, and from what we said in our pitch, people informed us that it seemed more like a short story. So we are now not going to reveal the masked killer, we are just going to hear him whispering Kirstie's name.


Below I have attatched a picture of Chelsea and I delievering our pitch: